A Dozen Halloween Jokes That Will Have You In Stitches

Ready to cry tears of laughter? We asked the staff of our Halloween stores to share their funniest Halloween jokes and boy have they got some great ones!

One Liners From Our Halloween Store Staff

What do witches put on their hair?
Scare spray
Submitted by our Saskatoon East Halloween store

What is a ghost’s favourite party game?
Submitted by our Regina Halloween store

What do you call a fat pumpkin?
A plumpkin
Submitted by our Sherwood Park Halloween store

Why are ghosts so bad at lying?
You can see right through them
Submitted by our St. John’s Halloween store

Why do vampires need mouthwash?
Because they have bat breath
Submitted by our Milton Halloween store

Picture Jokes

Halloween Jokes Latte
Haha! Pumpkin spice lattes are a delicious Halloween treat but human spice – blurgh!
Halloween Jokes
Oh yeah…
Halloween Joke
You wouldn’t want this fella on your Halloween trivia team

Longer Halloween Jokes

A photographer goes to a haunted castle determined to get a picture of a ghost on Halloween. The ghost he encounters turns out to be friendly and poses for a snapshot. The happy photographer later downloads his photos and finds that the photos are underexposed and completely blank.


Sarah: What are a ghost’s favorite rides at the fair?
Brian: Tell me.
Sarah: The scary-go-round and rollerghoster!


Two monsters went to a Halloween party. Suddenly one said to the other, “A lady just rolled her eyes at me. What should I do?”
“Be a gentleman and roll them back to her.”


Have you got any of your own Halloween jokes? Share them with us on Twitter using #HallweenAlley – or better yet, come and challenge our Halloween store (g)hosts to a Halloween joke battle. Don’t forget to join our Comical Week event in store Saturday October 14th – they’ll be laughs-a-plenty!